Andy Rooney is more of an ass than me

I caught 60 minutes tonight for first time in about five or ten years. You know, that show with Barbara Walt- oh no, the one with the ticking. I think it’s supposed to be a clock or something.

I was enticed to watch because of an advertisement of a Tiger Woods piece that was slated to delve deep into the personal life of Tiger. The interview sucked. Tiger didn't release a whole lot of information. He did however talk about his learning centers for minority children that are popping up all over the world. That was interesting I guess. If only we all could be poster children like Tiger.

Anyway, I hung around for the weekly editorial by Andy Rooney that has been going on since fall of the Roman Empire, and Andy was as pissy as ever.

Rooney went on a rant about girl scout cookies for some unexplainable reason. He talked about how it only costs them $1.25 to buy the cookies and they sell them for $4.25, implying that girl scouts are involved in some criminal conspiracy to rip off the American public at large. He also boo-hooed about all the chemical ingredients, and claimed that he would ask the next girl trying to sell him cookies if she could explain to him what partially hydrogenated palm oil was.

Damn Andy. You're one ruthless, hard-nosed son of a bitch. Honestly, I wouldn't even say that. These poor girls are trying to make a few bucks for their damn scout troop so they can pitch tents and paddle their friggin' canoes around some lake. That stuff ain't cheap.

Of course I may in fact end up as heartless as Andy Rooney, but in the meantime I don't think I'll be watchin' the clock in anticipation.

The Tragedy of JonBenet

There are few in this great world of ours that weren't glued to the countless episodes of Hard Copy and Inside Edition during the investigation of the JonBenet Ramsey murder which occurred sometime during Christmas night of 1996. The media saw grand opportunity with the thought of publicizing the death of a six year old beauty queen who was the daughter of a wealthy business owner in the seemingly utopian confines of Boulder, CO.

It was a captivating story. And the most captivating part was that the investigation pointed directly in one direction ----> The Ramseys.

Steve Thomas was one of the lead investigators for the Boulder Police Department and spent nearly two years on the case before resigning from the BDP. Thomas cited corruption, ineptitude, and blatant unwillingness of the BDP to prosecute the Ramseys in his resignation letter. Shortly after his resignation, he wrote a book detailing his experience and the investigation over-all.

Steve pointed the finger directly at JonBenet's mother, Patsy, as the killer and did a reasonable job backing up his claim. There is little doubt that Patsy penned the lengthy ransom letter that was written inside the house with a pen and paper belonging to the Ramseys. There is also little doubt that there was no intruder that could have possibly come into the Ramsey’s house, abducted JonBenet, fed her pineapple (autopsy report), brutally killed her, and then casually write a three page essay asking for $118,000 from a CEO that was worth millions - all while three Ramseys slept.

So let's just assume, for argument's sake,, that one or all of the Ramseys were involved in the murder of JonBenet. That leaves me with two problems.

The first of which is the fact that the Boulder police turned a blind eye to the compelling evidence against the Ramseys and refused to take steps toward prosecution. Why did they do this? Could the laid back, non-confrontational Boulder attitude prevent law enforcement officers from doing their job? Could they not stomach the thought of putting a beautiful mother who just lost her daughter through a trial that could very well land her in prison for life?

I'll tell you what, when I lived in Boulder the cops nailed me for every damn traffic violation possible and when I showed up in court, I might as well jave been Al Capone pleading innocent to ever being involved in organized crime. I guess they are a tad more lenient with a former Miss West Virginia with a rich husband.

My second issue involves the ability of the Ramseys (assuming they were involved in the murder) to somehow justify their innocence in their minds. What convoluted arrangement in one's mind can possibly allow you to shift blame from yourself if you are in-fact the guilty party? Maybe they pawn it off as "god's will" to have them kill their daughter. In my mind, there is no other explanation.

The Ramseys were a very religious family and it may or may not have been a coincidence that an open Bible was found on John Ramsey’s desk when police arrived at the crime scene. The Ramseys also used their religiousness to prove their innocence in the minds of the public. The Ramseys, when confronted with the fact that they were suspects, asked how any god-fearing person could kill their daughter. They also strategically made public appearances with reporters and television crews while leaving church.

I think its pretty sleazing to hide behind a religious curtain (and a team of world-class lawyers), instead of presenting hard evidence. Maybe it was because hard evidence didn't exist.

The questions that remain are as follows:

Who killed JonBenet?
Why were the Ramseys not prosecuted?
If one or all of the Ramseys was involved, how can they look themselves in the mirror every day?


JonBenet knows what happened. And so does someone who was in that house on 15th street in Boulder.

The Game: The Essence of Manipulation

Last year, a bright young writer named Neil Strauss published a book called The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pick-up Artists. Neil Strauss is a writer in Los Angeles who before joining the "secret society" wrote for Rolling Stone Magazine and occasionally for the New York Times. Despite a fantastic start to a writing career for a guy in his late twenties, Strauss was unsatisfied and frustrated. He even declared himself an AFC (average frustrated chump). Neil was frustrated because he coudn't get laid - it was as simple as that.

Strauss joined the society of pick-up artists and after a year and a half of "sarging" (hitting on chicks), Neil claimed to have ten girlfriends with whom he would have sex as he wished. He would also go out to clubs and be ravaged by women. At one time he was seduced in a women's bathroom by an off-duty stripper. His adventure culminated in the openning of "Project Hollywood", which was a mansion in the Hollywood hills where pick-up artists would live, conduct training seminars, and seduce women.

Though Strauss' accounts left room for suspicion of embelishment (he wrote one paragraph while having sex and did not edit the typos to maintain authenticity), the story was compelling and I believe, for the most part true. And when I closed the book that intentionally looks exactly like a Bible, I thought about how our world has come to this.

The behavior of the pick-up artists is nothing short of pure manipulation. They intentionally berate and ridicule women in an effort to force them to seek the approval of the pick-up artist. And you wanna know what? It works. People have told me that if you treat 'em like dirt, they'll stick to you like mud. Is this true? According to Neil Strauss it might as well be the word of God.

But who is to blame for this? Men? Women? Society? Humanity? God?

Can you blame women for allowing men to treat them like shit and keep coming back for more, essentially positively reinforcing the behavior?

I can.

C'mon ladies! Let's make some progress. Let's move beyond your instictive nature to end up with arrogant, heartless, seemingly confident (but actually insecure) men. All this behavior by women will do is perpetuate the problem, and actually wire it more firmly into the brains of men. Men think like this:

I be asshole - I get laid. When it works, the think:

I be more asshole - I get more laid.

How can you argue with that logic? You can't - because it's true.

Men will not stop this behavior until they are forced to do so. Forced by women.

However, for the next millenium or so while women are rewiring their own brains and the brains of their children, Neil and the gang will be tenaciously sarging.

What the hell? It's worth at try...