Put Up a Fence to Keep All the Mexicans Out
In light of all this talk about the proposal by the United States to build a fence across the entire Mexican border, I thought up a little jingle to sum up the situation. So here’s the world premier of “Put Up a Fence to Keep all the Mexicans Out” (sing along to the tune of Ani Difranco’s “Paved Paradise”).
They put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
With big steel posts, some barbs, and a swingin’ front gate.
Don’t it really make some sense,
When we can’t think up something more than a fence.
They put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
They took some illegals and put ‘em to work down there.
And they paid those folks a dollar and half to do it.
Don’t it make you want to fight,
When those folks in Congress, they, they just might.
Put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
So you can now say you heard it here first when this song is top on the charts and the US is half-way through a several billion dollar stint of building a fence from the Gulf of Mexico to the Pacific Ocean, that will of course be largely built by illegal immigrants.
Now, I don’t know much about the problem of illegal immigration (if it is a problem) or the potential for terrorists invading our country through Mexico, but I do know that this is an archaic, self-centered, insecure, and lazy way to address a problem that may or may not exist. I guess we figure that the Great Wall of China was a decent idea in 500 B.C., so why wouldn’t something similar work in 2006? In this day and age of technology, communication, transportation, and canned foods that have a shelf-life of twenty-five years, can’t we come up with something better than a damn fence? I thought you build a fence to keep your neighbor’s lawn clippings out of your yard; and you usually don’t get an invite to their next dinner party.
Mr. President did say that it would be the most technologically advanced fence in the world. I guess it will have those doors that open and close automatically from the middle, like in Star Trek. Or maybe it will have some automated female voice with an English accent saying, “Scram! Scram!” when someone gets within half a mile.
He's probably also banking on the fact that the Mexican pole vaulting team won't make a spririted attempt at running for the border.
I used to build a wall of pillows in the backseat of the car to keep my little brother from bothering me during long car trips. I was ten.
If the wall idea somehow fails to pass, perhaps we could build a moat filled with hungry alligators with a big drawbridge in Tijuana. There could be border patrol on the other side firing flaming arrows and catapulting rocks at any potential trespassers.
I wonder what Ani Difranco would think of all this?
They put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
With big steel posts, some barbs, and a swingin’ front gate.
Don’t it really make some sense,
When we can’t think up something more than a fence.
They put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
They took some illegals and put ‘em to work down there.
And they paid those folks a dollar and half to do it.
Don’t it make you want to fight,
When those folks in Congress, they, they just might.
Put up a fence to keep all the Mexicans out.
So you can now say you heard it here first when this song is top on the charts and the US is half-way through a several billion dollar stint of building a fence from the Gulf of Mexico to the Pacific Ocean, that will of course be largely built by illegal immigrants.
Now, I don’t know much about the problem of illegal immigration (if it is a problem) or the potential for terrorists invading our country through Mexico, but I do know that this is an archaic, self-centered, insecure, and lazy way to address a problem that may or may not exist. I guess we figure that the Great Wall of China was a decent idea in 500 B.C., so why wouldn’t something similar work in 2006? In this day and age of technology, communication, transportation, and canned foods that have a shelf-life of twenty-five years, can’t we come up with something better than a damn fence? I thought you build a fence to keep your neighbor’s lawn clippings out of your yard; and you usually don’t get an invite to their next dinner party.
Mr. President did say that it would be the most technologically advanced fence in the world. I guess it will have those doors that open and close automatically from the middle, like in Star Trek. Or maybe it will have some automated female voice with an English accent saying, “Scram! Scram!” when someone gets within half a mile.
He's probably also banking on the fact that the Mexican pole vaulting team won't make a spririted attempt at running for the border.
I used to build a wall of pillows in the backseat of the car to keep my little brother from bothering me during long car trips. I was ten.
If the wall idea somehow fails to pass, perhaps we could build a moat filled with hungry alligators with a big drawbridge in Tijuana. There could be border patrol on the other side firing flaming arrows and catapulting rocks at any potential trespassers.
I wonder what Ani Difranco would think of all this?
posted by John Poole at 10:22 PM
2 Comments:
Dude, I thought that was a Counting Crows song. Does that make me a bitch? And I bet Ani's pretty frickin' pissed off, especially if she's caught the news over the past 5 years or so.
just an fyi...neither ani difranco nor the counting crows wrote that song. it was joni mitchell and it is called "big yellow taxi" not "paved paradise"
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